The average American spends $120,000 on romantic dinners, movie outings and thoughtful gifts, not to mention toiletries and cosmetics, over the course of a lifetime.
As a result, 22% of millennials and 19% of Gen Z have started taking on “dating debt,” according to a report from LendingTree.
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- What is ‘dating debt’?
- Where does the problem come from?
- When does “dating debt” start piling up?
- How can you work?
What is ‘dating debt’?
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Another Credit Karma survey found that 29% of people ages 18 to 34 have racked up dating debt, and 21% have more than $500 in dating debt in a year. Reasons given include spending too much by mistake (29%), trying to impress dates (28%), and seeking intimacy (19%).
However, according to another Finder survey, 44% of Generation Z perceive debt to be a deciding factor when looking for a spouse.
This underscores the potential link between accumulating dating debt and difficulties building genuine love connections.
The search for love and connection is closely related to the taste for luxury, which ultimately leads to the accumulation of debt, which is a problem for younger generations.
The trend has ramifications for financial stability, emotional well-being and the basic foundation of modern relationships.
There are several factors driving this, including the need to express status and the compelling retail marketing of luxury as synonymous with love, which creates a false sense of connection between luxury and love.
Where does the problem come from?
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The accumulation of debt from romantic commitments arises from an underlying human impulse: the desire to demonstrate status. Standing out from the crowd has never been more difficult in a digital age where social media and online dating platforms are the standard, but it is also essential.
The idea of ”costly signaling” can help understand why such habits are formed. It argues that humans and animals use risky or resource-intensive behaviors as real, hard-to-falsify messages about their desirable qualities and availability.
This is similar to conspicuous consumption, which is motivated by the desire for status and the public display of that status.
The signaling of status in relationships or social groups is not common, but it has acquired a pecuniary form in new generations. Luxury experiences and items are increasingly associated with a different type of self-expression among young adults.
When does “dating debt” start piling up?
An expensive dinner at a luxury restaurant or the gift of a designer bag become symbols of difference and prestige. While these behaviors offer a degree of uniqueness to a relationship, they also carry the risk of financial insecurity.
However, there seems to be a fascinating contradiction in the relationship between luxury goods and social bonds.
While luxury items can improve a person’s social image and self-perception, people tend to view themselves more positively when they own or experience luxury, even if they often have a negative opinion of others who do the same.
This reveals an intriguing difference in self-versus-other judgments of luxury consumption.
In a dating situation, for example, a person who brags about buying expensive wine at a dinner party may overestimate whether it will really impress their date.
Gift givers often assume that more expensive gifts are more appreciated because they demonstrate greater thoughtfulness. However, current recipients do not always share this idea, as they do not consistently link the price of the gift with the amount of gratitude.
This implies that gift-givers may not be able to accurately anticipate which gifts will be important to others. And, because they may associate expensive gifts with something meaningful, they may spend more, which contributes to increasing relationship debt.
How can you work?
While it is well known that people use luxury products to express their social standing and earning power, their reactions to such gifts can be nuanced. In fact, many people value their independence and are wary of the motivations of others who make such gifts, fearing imbalances in power and expectations.
Instead, they may value personal ties over monetary displays and be wary of new relationships in the early stages.
Finally, open and honest communication about expectations is critical to overcoming these difficulties and ensuring that gift-giving aligns with mutual relationship goals and desires.
The concept of luxury is often confused with our search for love, resulting in a tempting but deceptive relationship between the two. In the world of romantic relationships, expensive things or luxurious experiences can sometimes make us feel closer to our spouses than we do to ourselves.
However, the connection between luxury and love can be misleading. While luxury can surely enhance romance, it’s critical that younger generations understand the distinction between flashy items and the deep, abiding bonds that bring us closer to love.
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Source: vtt.edu.vn