DEAR ABBY: My son and his wife rent property to me and my husband at a very reasonable price in today’s not-so-reasonable world. We recently found out that they had a cat, even though the lease they signed clearly states that pets are not allowed.
My son said we are taking this personally instead of addressing it as owners. As we can No Take this personally? He and his new wife have broken our trust. The irony is that if we approached this just as landlords, we would evict them immediately.
What can we say to make them understand how hurt we are without ruining the relationship? They are expecting a baby soon. We’ve already received the “sorry, not sorry” text message. This is destroying us as parents. — RULES ARE RULES IN PENNSYLVANIA
DEAR RULES: Tell your child that you feel disrespected because they adopted a cat without clearing it up with you. Although he may have said that he wants you to act like the landlord that he is, as a tenant, he is violating the terms of the lease that he signed.
Whether or not you decide to give him and his wife an exception for their cat and allow them to keep the animal, please refer to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention website (CDC.gov). Owners of pregnant cats should take precautions to avoid contracting toxoplasmosis, a parasitic infection that can be transmitted to the fetus during pregnancy.
DEAR ABBY: My wife and I are raising our two daughters (ages 6 and 7) along with my sister and her son (10). My sister and her baby’s father separated before the birth of her son because he was physically and emotionally abusive. However, the law allows him to continue in the child’s life.
I love my sister and my nephew, that’s why we raised our families as a village. The problem is that we are seeing similar characteristics in my nephew’s behavior towards our daughters. He is manipulative and a little “too familiar” with my oldest daughter. She admires him and he uses him to get her to do what he wants.
Now my 7 year old son is emotionally abusing and ostracizing my 6 year old son. I’m torn because my instinct is telling me to move and get my daughters away from my nephew, but he’s a boy too and I want to continue supporting him so he can become a decent man. However, I am not willing to sacrifice my daughters for his potential. To do? — CARING MOM/AUNT
DEAR MOM/AUNT: Your children should come before your sister’s child. Because your older daughter is now modeling her cousin’s bad behavior and acting out against her little sister, it’s time to discourage that behavior and limit, if not cut off, the contact she has with her cousin before it creates harm. durable. You can’t save everyone. It is your duty to protect your daughters from any negative influence.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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